making friends

Now that S has started school, he has made a few new friends! Some live right up the street from us and others live a bit farther out, and he is having trouble understanding that not everyone can just walk on over to our house to play. It's cute but kind of sad when he gets upset that the only time he sees a few of them are during the week! They are becoming buddies and I'm glad to have them over but I never see any other these parents!

I've tried texting a few with no response and calling others with an awkward exchange. I want to invite the kids with the parents over, not a drop off play date, I'm not free babysitting, give me a break! So that got me thinking if the rest of his school years would be like that -- parents not interested in forming a relationship with other parents while the kids play together. Is that like a thing of the past? Is it going to be just as hard finding mom friends as it night be form my kid to make friends at school?

I was really looking forward to meeting new friends that we had our kids in common since the current mom friends I have live far away (23-25 miles west or east of us!) and have kiddos older or babies (seriously not one is the age of S or Z and for a while it was fine and worked but now its just not a great fit)! Not to mention they all work nearly 40 hours a week and their weekends are always booked (always! like I need to pencil in something a month in advance to hang out with them!). It was great to meet a few good moms while Z was at gymnastic lessons and S was going to preschool, but all those contacts have faded away, and believe me I have contacted those parents again and again to get together so the kids can play and we can get to know some new people, but every time I reach out I get nothing back! I get nothing back and it makes me sad for the kids more than anything!

It's hard making friends as a grown up! A lot harder than I thought it was going to be!

So what's a mom to do, how do you meet new friends as a grown up? Or the new trending term "tribe". I'm just a girl, looking for a tribe to call on for some adult conversation while the kids play and a couple or two for backyard hangouts so we don't have to spend money on a babysitter.
Well I came up with a few ideas, and found a couple others in my search!

Reconnect with old friends - Well I've been doing that with no avail so I'm not sure how that one works for other, but I'll keep it in my back pocket.

Connect with co-workers - Ok, that could work, most of my husbands are older with no kids, but it's possible. As for me, i work contract jobs and I don't even know who is in my area, it's like we are all mystery co-workers, I hear about them but have never met them!

Connections from social media - Hmmm, not sure about this, maybe a meetup dot com group is what this example is leaning toward? Local facebook page groups, that makes more sense, it's the same basic idea of chatting with a stranger at the playground or bar.

Volunteer - Yes, this is a great example that when the kids are old enough we will definitely utilize!

Take a class - That is on my goal list and I'm trying but between class times and budgets, it's another save for another time idea.

MOMS Club or MOPS - Yea, that worked great when S was born and I did make a few great people, but we were on the outskirts of the groups "area" so a bit much to drive toward Forest Park every other day for a play date and nobody came "all the way out" to our house for play dates which was very disappointing. Not to mention as soon as those kids hit 2 years old they were all in preschool/dayschool and S was left with the infants to play with! It works for awhile but not long term.

Your kids sports team - Yes, between swim lessons and baseball both coming up, these are two opportunities to reach out to other parents sitting and watching their kids to strike up something and over the weeks get together, for sure!

Patience. Not everyone is do gung-ho about making friends or new people in general. Stay connected but not clingy. Some might come around, some old friends might resurface, but remember this is the phase you are in right now. It might be for awhile but you still have your family unit, so just be patient.

I'D RATHER HAVE 4 QUARTERS THAN 100 PENNIES

xo

cozy restaurants around town

Today in St. Louis it was rainy and gusting winds. The raindrops hit your face like a pin speeding through the air, the rain seemed to let up, then down poured as soon as you stepped out of the car. And on top of all that, I had to do the grocery shopping with my 4 year old in tow!

As soon as we got home I made hot chocolate, we ate graham crackers, and snuggled under three blankets as we watched her favorite show. Now that is a much better way to spend this kind of day!
Then I starting thinking about what I was going to cook for dinner. Something cozy and comforting and I hoped that this weather would subside this weekend, because Joe and I have a date night! We still haven't figured out where we want to go for dinner or if we want to check out what events are happening around town, but the more I talk about it, just staying at one nice little cozy restaurant with a fabulous meal and a few wonderful drinks, sounds so relaxing! Just talk and share a meal in a corner to ourselves ... away from everyday life ... aahhh! Ok, I'm sold, where is this gem of a place!!

~The Schlafly Tap Room, opened in 1991, was the first brewery to open in Missouri since Prohibition, paving the way for more breweries in St. Louis. There are generally around 16-18 hand-crafted beers available on tap in the historic building. Live music can be heard on the weekends and the restaurant regularly hosts events, such as the Belgian Beer and Mussel Festival, Oyster Fest and various beer tastings!

~Dressel's, it's a St. Louis institution, one of the very best spots in town for a pint of good beer and cultured conversation. Without robbing Dressel’s of any of its charms, its food is one of the best in town. The dishes are elegant and deeply flavored, and with tree fireplaces throughout the pub, you can find a cozy corner for a great night out!

~Blondie's, has some of life's best comforts -- coffee, wine and dessert -- at this cute downtown cafe. After a meal on Washington Ave. you can enjoy your indulgences fireside for an extra dose of awesome!

~Chava's, this Mexican restaurant rose from the ruins of perennial Soulard dive, but it wasn't a bad trade-off at all. Chava's menu keeps things short and to the point: tacos, a fajita platter, a burrito, an enchilada, a tostada, etc. and along with their great chips and salsa, is an excellent night of Dos Equis Amber and conversation!

~SqWires, built into part of the renovated Western Wire Products factory in Lafayette Square, they focus on simple, spirited food. The happy hour is pretty solid with above average drink offerings group-friendly food like plates are easy to share, and each offers something for someone. SqWires'  is an American restaurant is a great place for food, cocktails and live music -- all while enjoying the huge modern fireplace that fits in beautifully against the historic backdrop!

~Tapped, is the first self-pour bar in the St. Louis area, offering not only 39 beers and eight wines, but even one tap of cold-pressed coffee. Upon arrival, you check in at the hostess stand and open a tab. You then get a bracelet, simply by tapping it on the tablet screen behind each tap, you're accessing your account and allowing the system to monitor your pour. You can draw exactly as much as you want, a full glass, a few swigs, even just a sip or two, and you'll be charged by the ounce. Tasting notes are included on each screen for those who like to educate themselves and those who'd rather talk their way through a decision can ask the staff! 

~Fox & Hound Tavern, located in the Cheshire Inn, this English-style pub is the place to kick back with some good friends and good drinks. Relax with some whisky or scotch by the fire, and let the evening melt away!

~Rosalita's, they offer a signature table-side guacamole made right in front of you or a piled high nachos and a full array of classic Mexican dishes and more modern specialties. The house margaritas are the best in town, and the gorgeous interior with hanging lanterns and covered booths make for a hide-a-way among the crowd on a Saturday night!

~Hendrick's, It feels odd to call a cuisine as essentially American as barbecue not merely trendy, but hot right now! Yet if you have any doubts, Hendricks BBQ provides the proof! This massive place sits down from the rest of St. Charles Main Street but is an awesome find with great ambiance, loft seating, huge skylight and a tucked away space for live music! You could spend time in here bouncing from one section of the restaurant to another and have a cozy evening together!

EAT, DRINK & BE COZY

xo